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Posted on 28/8/2016
Posted on 28/08/2016

Amakosa abantu bari mu myaka 30 bakora mu gihe cyo gutera akabariro

Abantu bari mu myaka 30 usanga baba bashyushye cyane ku byerekeranye n’imibonano mpuzabitsina kuko aribwo abenshi baba bagishinga ingo cyangwa babyitegura.

Nubwo ari myaka myiza ariko abahanga mu by’imibanire ndetse n’ubunararibonye mu byo gutera akabariro bagaragaje mu kinyamakuru Huffington Post ko hari amakosa abantu bakora muri iyo myaka ashobora gusenya umubano wabo n’abakunzi babo baramutse batitonze.

-  Ubunebwe mu gutera akabariro

Shannon Chavez wo mu Mujyi wa Los Angeles yagize ati “Usanga abantu bose bakurikiza ibintu byabaye akamenyero mu gutera akabariro. Kwambura imyenda uwo mugiye gukorana icyo gikorwa, ugahita umusoma, ubundi ukajya mu gikorwa nyir’izina.”

Yongeyeho ati“ Ibyo ni ubunebwe, gutera akabariro umuntu agomba kubishakira umwanya , akabyitegura mu mutwe akanategura mugenzi we ku buryo amuremamo ibyishimo mu bwenge.”

-  Kugaragaraza uburakari igihe wumva nta bushake wifitemo
Stephen Snyder avuga ko bibaho kuba umuntu yakumva adakunze ibyo gutera akabariro ariko ko umuti atari ukubireka no kugaragaza uburakari.

Ati “Ubushake bwo gutera akabariro bushobora kubura kuri umwe mu bashakanye ariko ikingenzi si ukubireka no kugaragaza uburakari bw’uko utabishaka, mushobora kwiha gahunda y’igihe cyo bikora gihoraho kuko aribwo ubushake bugenda bugaruka buhoro buhoro aho kubireka burundu.”

-  Kutita ku gikorwa cyo gutera akabariro igihe ufite uruhinja

Inzobere Laurel Steinberg yagize iti “Mu by’ukuri abana bato bakenera kwitabwaho amanywa n’ijoro bigatuma igihe cyose umubyeyi ahora ananiwe.”

Ngo uko byagenda kose muba mugomba gushaka umwanya haba mu masaha ya kare cyangwa se mu masaha akuze maze icyo gikorwa kikabaho.

Iyi mpuguke ikomeza igira iti “ Buri wese agomba guhora yitaye kuri mugenzi we, kandi nibyo bituma umwe adashobora kujya gushakira ahandi uwo kumufasha gutera akabariro. Umubano wanyu ni rwo ruhinja rwa mbere ugomba kwitaho, maze uwo mwabyaye agakurikiraho.”

-  Gufata igikorwa cyo gutera akabariro nk’aho ari intambara
Imibonano mpuzabitsina nubwo ari ubuzima ndetse ari igikorwa cyubashywe ariko ntabwo igomba gufatwa nk’aho ari ikintu gikomeye gikwiye kuburamo umwanya wo gukina, guteta no kwishimisha.

Iyo ubikomeje, ukabigira intambara, ni ha handi umwe yumva atanyuzwe, bisaba ko ugomba kwirekura nubwo waba utari inzobere muri byo.

Abahanga bavuga ko gukina no kubanza kwitegura igikorwa bigira uruhare mu migendekere myiza yacyo nubwo bititabwaho kenshi.

-  Gukomeza gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina ubabara

Abahanga bagaragaza ko nyuma yo kubyara, akenshi abagore baribwa cyane iyo barimo gutera akabariro.

Igisubizo ngo ni ukujya kwa muganga w’abagore kuko gukomeza gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina umugore aribwa cyangwa se ataka bitesha ubushake umugabo we, akabihirwa aho kwishima.

-  Kwirengagiza umuryango kubera akazi

Nubwo mu myaka ya za 30 aba ari imyaka yo gukora no gushakisha uko urugo rwatera imbere, inzobere zivuga ko urugo atari rwo rukwiye kwirengagizwa.

Vanessa Marin, ati “ Abantu baba bari ku gitutu cyo gukora cyane no gushakisha amafaranga ariko n’urugo ruba rubakeneye kandi kugira ngo ubuzima bwo gutera akabariro bugende neza, ni uko ububonera umwanya , ukabyitaho udahubutse.”

-  Kugereranya urugo rwawe n’urw’abandi

Steinberg agira ati “Nubwo abantu bubatse usanga baganira ku bijyanye no gutera akabariro mu ngo zabo, ntabwo ugomba kubigereranya n’urwawe ngo wumve ko uko bakora ari ko nawe wakora.”

“Ibyo gutera akabariro bireba umugore n’umugabo, nta wundi uba ukwiye kuzamo hagati, mwebwe mwembi nimwe mumenya ko bibanogeye cyangwa se ko bitabanogeye mukabihindura.”

Uwineza Vanessa@Rwandapaparazzi.rw

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