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Ese Abashakanye bashobora kurambana badakora imibonano mpuzabitsina Bigakunda ? “INKURU”

Mu miryango myinshi usanga guhuza urugwiro mu gitanda hagati y’abashakanye ari ishingiro ry’urukundo rurambye ndetse no kubaka urugo rukomeye.

 

Mariella Frostrup utanga inama z’uburyo abashakanye bagomba kubana yabwiye umwe mu bagore b’inshuti ye ko urukundo rutarimo imibonano mpuzabitsina ntaho rushobora kugera.

Uyu mubyeyi ahamya ko ntaho abashakanye bashobora kugera mu gihe cyose hatabaho imibonano mpuzabitsina, ashimangira ko mu muryango nta gishobora gusimbura ibyishimo biyiturukaho.

Ariko se bigenda bite iyo umwe mu bashakanye atayishaka, ibyo se bishobora gutuma umwe muri bo ajya kwishakira undi uzajya amunezeza mu buriri?

Umwe mu miryango ine y’abashakanye yabwiye The Mirror dukesha iyi nkuru ko babaho ubuzima butarimo imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Iki kinyamakuru cyabajije abahanga mu by’imibanire n’imibonano mpuzabitsina niba ubwo buzima bushoboka.

Dr Pam Spurr, umuhanga mu by’imibanire ati “Yego birashoboka ko habaho imiryango ibanye neza kandi idakora imibonano mpuzabitsina.” Gusa n’ubwo uyu muganga ahamya ko umubano ushobora kutaba mwiza hagati y’abashakanye igihe badakora imibonano mpuzabitsina ariko anagaragaza ko atariko buri gihe bimera.

Ati “Ntabwo buri gihe kudakora imibonano mpuzabitsina ku bashakanye kandi babana bituma habaho gusenyuka k’umuryango kuko nzi imiryango myinshi ibaho itayikora.”

Gusa ibyo bisaba ko bose baba babyumva kimwe niba hari ubumuga umwe afite cyangwa bombi bakaba babuziranyeho.

Hari n’abavuga ko kuva baramaze kubyara barabonye abana kandi aribo bari bakeneye batazongera gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina kandi bakabigendanamo neza.

Hari nubwo bose bumva badashaka ubuzima bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina kandi ntibitume badakomeza kubana neza. Uyu muganga ahamya ko abo bombi baba bagomba kubyemeranyaho ku buryo ntawe uzajya arizwa no kubura icyo gikorwa cyangwa ngo igihe baryamye umwe ashotore undi, kuko byabagonganisha.

Atanga inama ko igihe umwe mu bashakanye ashaka kubaho ubwo buzima aba akwiye kubiganiriza mugenzi we bigafata igihe kugeza babyumve kimwe.

Ati “Ugomba kubanza ukagenzura ko igihe wumva utagishaka imibonano mpuzabitsna bidashobora kuba byaraturutse ku kwiheba gukabije, umunaniro ukabije, imiti urimo gufata n’ibindi.”

Dr Rebecca Dakin, inzobere mu by’imibonano mpuzabitsina we yatangaje ko bidashoboka.

Dr Dakin avuga ko igihe hatariho imibonano mpuzabitsina, abantu baba ari inshuti gusa zisanzwe avuga ko atiyumvisha ukuntu abashakanye babaho mu buzima bw’abakundana bishimye kandi badakora imibonano mpuzabitsina.

Kuri we gukora imibonano hagati y’abashakanye kandi babana ngo ni umurunga ubahuza bombi. Ati “Keretse gusa ufite uburwayi bubikubuza cyangwa se ukaba ugeze mu myaka 80 y’ubukuru ituma ntacyo ubasha gukora .Ni gute wabaho ubuzima butarimo imibonano mpuzabitsina ubana n’uwo mwashakanye.”

Iyo icyo gikorwa kitabaho n’ibyabahuzaga ndetse n’ibyo mwishimiraga biragabanuka kandi imibanire yanyu iba itangiye kugana mu manga.

Ati “Nta muntu n’umwe mu bashakanye wahamya ko kuba abana n’uwo bashakanye ariko badakora imibonano mpuzabitsina bimushimishije.”

Uyu muganga avuga ko niyo babana batabikora umwe muri bo atabura kujya gushaka undi babasha kubikorana. Yemeza ko hari impamvu zo kumva utagishaka imibonano wenda bitewe no kuba waracuze, ufite umunaniro ukabije cyangwa se waramaze kubona abana wifuzaga bigatuma ubireka burundu.

Ati “Imibonano mpuzabitsina ntabwo ari ukwinjiza igitsina mu kindi gusa hari uburyo bwinshi.”

Uyu muganga ngo yagiye yakira abantu bari bararetse gukora imibonano kuko bumvaga batabishaka, yababwiye ko bagomba kugenda bakayikora mu buryo butandukanye kandi bagarutse baramushimira.

Iyi nzobere mu bijyanye n’imibonano ivuga ko gutera akabariro ari igikorwa kitagomba kubura hagati y’abashyingiranywe bakibana.

Uwineza Vanessa@Rwandapaparazzi.rw

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